It's the feeling I have felt so many times before but I pull away from it. I love the feeling but these bad butterflies never ever feel normal to me. My stomach just isn't used to all this fluttering. I can't sleep without thinking, and eat when I do think about the cause of these bad butterflies.
They're not evil nor is its cause but maybe the fear is just eating me up. I heat up like a schoolgirl and hold my breath in when I think about why these butterflies inhabit my tummy and I get so afraid sometimes but I know this time, I must not make an exit.
I am old enough and I face disappointment when I become too scared of the feeling and of course I would get the results I don't want when I literally push it away. I'm ready. I think. No. I am.
